


Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

by derrotelowe



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Best Friends, Childhood Memories, Flashbacks, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Katt (Voltron), M/M, Memories, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post S7 Voltron, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-16 15:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16956168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/derrotelowe/pseuds/derrotelowe
Summary: Keith and Matt have always been each other's support, even throughout the war-- until Voltron mysteriously disappeared for three years. Time passed quickly for Keith, but Matt lived through every grueling day. After the battle on Earth, Keith came to find Matt to be a different person. Would their relationship stay the same, even after all these years?





	Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figured I'd post this before everything went to hell on Friday. I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this, but I hope y'all enjoy the story! Besides, nothing's wrong with a little bit of Katt. 
> 
> Side note: Matt's girlfriend isn't in the fic. I've planned things without her because I don't know her character and it would be difficult to invest time developing her. It'll all be explained later in the story!

Bright sunlight warmed Keith’s cheeks and aroused him from unconsciousness. His eyes, unaccustomed to the light, squinted as he opened them. He was confused as he looked around, seeing that he was laying in an unfamiliar bed with blank, empty walls surrounding him. A large window was placed on his left, allowing piercing sunlight to flood the room. In front of him sat his mother, Krolia, their fingers laced together. Off to the side were Kolivan and Kosmo, waiting for him to wake up. He wanted to sit up, maybe even hug his mom, but the growing pain in his chest and forehead told him otherwise.

Krolia smiled upon seeing that he was awake and squeezed his hand. She bent down to plant a kiss to his forehead and rubbed her thumb over his calloused knuckles.

“How are you feeling, Keith?”

To be honest, Keith didn’t know how to respond. He had just woken up from a slumber of who-knows-how-long after defeating one of the most powerful Galran fleets in the universe, which would have obliterated Earth with a single shot. If that wasn’t stressful enough, he had practically sliced Sendak in half after he attempted to murder his brother, Shiro, then fought alongside the Atlas to destroy this mecha-type robot— whatever that goddamn thing was called— that nearly killed tens of thousands before plummeting to Earth at hundreds of miles per hour alongside his friends.

And, on top of all that, he wasn’t dead.

So, really, Keith wasn’t doing so bad after all. He was still exhausted and in pain of course, but at least he got to live to see another day. And now that the war was (supposedly) over, Keith would actually be able to relax for once in his life. Things were genuinely beginning to look up for him, and he couldn’t be any happier.

“I’m.. doing alright, actually.”

Krolia squeezed his hand, smiling at the honesty of his words. “I’m glad to hear that.”

Extending her other arm, she tucked a few loose strands of hair behind his ear and cradled his cheek in the palm of her hand. Her thumb brushed against the tip of his scar, and Keith couldn’t help but lean into the gesture. Out of the corner of his eye, Keith watched Kolivan stand and approach the side of his bed, graciously blocking the blinding sunlight.

“You showed true bravery on the battlefield, Keith,” he said, taking his free hand. “You’ve grown to be a true Marmoran soldier. I couldn’t be any prouder.”

Genuine compliments from the man himself? Keith thought he’d never see the day that something like _this_ happened, or maybe the pain medication he was on was _really_ strong. Nevertheless, Keith gave Kolivan’s hand a firm shake, replying, “Thank you, sir.”

Kosmo deemed that it was finally his turn to greet his companion, so he pushed past both Kolivan and Krolia, clambered up onto the bed, then prodded Keith’s forehead with his muzzle. The other couldn’t help but laugh, wrapping his arms around Kosmo’s fluffy neck.

Burying his face in his long, black fur, Keith took a deep breath and murmured, “Glad to see you too, buddy.” Then, Kosmo shifted to lay down and rested his head against Keith’s chest, careful to keep any excess weight off that might have intensified the bothersome aching.

Kolivan turned his attention to Krolia. “I’ll leave you two alone now. Keith—” he looked at the man in question—"I’m glad to see that you’re doing well.” With a wave of his hand, he walked out of the room while the others thanked him.

Now that he was gone, Krolia looked back at Keith and pulled his hand to her lips. Smiling, he sank further into the covers, finding that his energy was beginning to run low. Still, he spoke up, asking, “How are the others?”

“They’re recovering well. Lance and Allura should be out either today or tomorrow. Hunk and Pidge might need another day or two, but they’ll be fine. Shiro has been worried sick about all five of you, too. He’s come to ask how you’ve been doing several times now, but you’ve been asleep.”

Keith chuckled and sighed. “Why am I not surprised.. That’s good though, I’m glad to know that the team is doing well.”

Keith’s eyes became heavier and his muscles relaxed. He felt safe in the presence of Krolia, safe enough to drift back to sleep again with Kosmo snuggled against his side. But she continued to speak, and her tone, underlying with anxiousness, woke him up all over again.

“I figured you’d— I think you’d like to know, but he's back. I saw him in Pidge’s room. Your friend that you told me about awhile ago.”

Keith raised an eyebrow, confused. “Who?” He pondered, wondering who she could be referring to, but then he realized. His heart sunk. His chest tightened uncomfortably so. He looked at her, pain, excitement, and worry filling his eyes, as he asked one simple question.

“Is he okay?”

Krolia bit her lip and looked off to the side. “I don’t know. He came to visit you. Once. He seemed off, very anxious, kept it brief. He asked me to tell him when you woke up.”

Keith nodded, keeping his gaze from meeting Krolia’s. Kosmo offered him a concerned huff and nuzzled his side. He, in turn, brought Kosmo closer into his chest and settled his nose into his companion’s fur.

“Would you like me to get him? I can tell him you’re—”

“No.” Keith looked up at her, shaking his head. “Not right now. I just want to sleep.”

Krolia blinked, taken aback by the cold nature of Keith’s voice and icy gaze. Hesitantly, she nodded, taking his hand again with both of her own.

“Okay. Please, rest.” She extended her hand and brushed her thumb under his eye. “Let me know if you need anything.”

Keith nodded and gave her one last, strained smile. He closed his eyes, letting his face relax into Krolia’s hand. Hopefully sleep would help him clear his head, but it was impossible with dozens of racing thoughts swirling around all at the same time. Maybe, if he could just focus on one little thing, he’d fall asleep. Something like his mom’s comforting touch, Kosmo’s silky fur, the warmth of the sunlight...

 

*** 

 

Keith remembered the first time he met Matt.

It was about a month or two after he had settled in the Garrison. Shiro had wanted him to get comfortable with his surroundings before he introduced him to his acquaintances. Of course, Keith had seen Matt several times beforehand, talking to Shiro in his office or around the building. Sometimes, if Matt had caught sight of him, he’d give Keith a smile and a wave. But Keith, not knowing if he should respond, would blink before shrinking back down the hall.

However, Keith couldn’t do that anymore once Shiro officially introduced him to Matt. He had to actually _engage_ in conversation with someone he barely even knew, and that was literal torture. But, before he knew it, Shiro was leading him along to meet his so-called “really cool friend” who apparently was “really smart and nice” and “easy to get along with.”

Whatever. It’s not like it even mattered anyways; Matt was going to push him aside just like everyone else in due time. It wasn’t like that was a surprise to Keith. Still, Shiro had promised him ice cream to do this, so he approached Matt and looked him dead in the eye, serious as could be.

Unwavered by Keith’s piercing stare, Matt thrusted out a hand and shook the other’s, glowing with excitement.

"Hey, I'm Matt! I'm pretty sure you already know that, though."

His hands were warm and soft, and his smile was genuine and inviting. He made Keith want to smile right back, but he didn't want to give into such a taxing demand. 

“Matt’s not much older than you are, Keith, but he’s in the division just below me,” Shiro explained. “He’ll be my engineer on missions, along with his father, Captain Holt.”

“How?” Keith asked. “How— you’re so... young.”

“I don’t mean to brag, but—” Matt tugged on his collar and put on a sly smile, puffing his chest out for effect— “I’m kind of a prodigy myself. Also helps if your dad is an instructor and captain here.” He laughed as Shiro socked him in the arm before pushing him away. Turning his attention to Keith again, his overly-confident demeanor morphed back into his shining, positive self.

“I’ve heard so much about you from the big guy here,” Matt said as he nudged Shiro in the side, who chuckled in return. “I can’t wait to become friends with you, Shiro’s told me how cool you are.”

That had taken Keith’s breath away, leaving him speechless. No one, not ever, would have wanted to be friends with someone like him. But here Matt was, a blissful smile on his face without a single care in the world— like this was just natural for him. Keith then realized that Matt was expecting an answer, and all he could muster was a shaky, “Okay.”

Matt grinned and laughed. “Didn’t mean to scare you.” He reached out and patted Keith’s shoulder, winking. “Well, anyways, Shiro and I gotta catch a meeting with Commander Iverson. I’ll see you around!” He waved, Shiro ruffled Keith’s hair, and then they left, leaving Keith unable to process everything that just happened.

Matt ended up staying true to his word. It wasn’t long before they became inseparable, hanging out every chance they possibly could. Where Shiro showed him love and patience, Matt showed him excitement and how to have fun. Keith was beginning tosmile more, especially with Matt around. He loved to listen to Matt’s endless jokes or participate in his harmless pranks on the administrators. Often times, Keith would have dinner with the Holt family, alongside Shiro and his partner, Adam. After dinner, Matt would take both him and Katie, his sister, up to his room to talk about everything he’d learned from his books and classes. Matt taught Keith so many things and overflowed his mind with endless knowledge. Keith didn’t know what he would do without Matt, and he didn’t want to think about what life would be like without him.

Of course, he didn’t have to wonder that for long, because it soon became a reality.

Kerberos.

Keith lost his family, his _life_ , because of Kerberos. That mission— that goddamn mission— took everything away from him. Shiro, considered to be his older brother by then, was gone. And, his break-up with Adam made things tense between him and Keith, so finding comfort in him was out of the question. Sam had become sort of his uncle (too young to be a grandfather?) because of how close he became with the Holt family. And Matt? Matt was his everything. Matt was Keith’s only best friend, the only person he felt safe enough to be himself. He could laugh and joke and smile with him without a care in the world. Keith felt secure enough to open up to him too, even more so than Shiro— it was easier to bond with someone his age.

But no matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he loved, Keith lost everything. Everything in his life that mattered would wash away from existence, erasing every trace of evidence that it had ever existed. And that made him sick, furious, disgusted, and confused. What did he do to deserve all of this pain?

Keith never admitted to crying, but the day he found out about the supposed “pilot error,” he bawled his eyes out and punched the dorm wall until his knuckles were marred and oozing with blood. He felt sick to his stomach, fueled with rage, and all he wanted was to scream and beg for his family to come back.

Keith’s behavior became reckless as the months passed in the Garrison. He talked back to teachers, was often violent towards his classmates, and rarely completed his assignments. Sleepless nights plagued with nightmares and muffled sobbing became his routine. Then, after socking Commander Iverson in the face and permanently damaging his eye, he was expelled. A long-overdue decision, but better late than never.

Fast-forward two years. Keith found Shiro, joined a group of confused teens to assist in an intergalactic war with flying lions, and then he lost Shiro again. And then he found him, again— sort of?— before taking his own path to join the Blade of Marmora. He regularly completed missions for them but still resided at the castle for some time, where he and Katie, now known as Pidge, bonded over the loss of Matt. But, she soon began to find clues as to where he might be, if he was alive in the first place, of course. It wasn’t long before she set out on her journey to find her brother. Keith longed to go with her, but the rigorous requirements set by the Blade prevented him from missing a single mission. So, with envy, Keith watched her depart on her own. Maybe, if he was lucky enough, he would finally be able to see his beloved friend again.

And, for once in his life, Keith got what he wished for.

According to Pidge, Matt had been at the castle for several days while Keith was on one of his longer, more tedious missions. He remembered arriving back at the castle, exhausted and in pain, wanting nothing more but to curl up in his bed and take a nap. But a new, yet strangely recognizable, voice roused him from his increasing fatigue.

“Remember me?”

Keith straightened, looked at the person in front of him, mouth agape in surprise. It was Matt. _Holy shit— it was Matt._ A taller, bulkier Matt, that is. His voice was deeper, his hair was longer, and the scar on his cheek made Keith’s heart flutter in his chest like never before. He was at a loss for words as he stared at the kind smile filled with warmth in front of him.

“Cat got your tongue?” Matt asked, chuckling and making his way over to the frozen figure.

“Yeah— I mean no, I—” Keith sighed, taking the time to think of what to say. A smile blossomed onto his face when Matt stopped in front of him. “It’s just so good to see you again.”

Matt pulled him in for a hug, squeezing him just a little too tight, but Keith didn’t care. He latched on immediately, burying his face in his friend’s shoulder and shutting his eyes to keep his relieved tears at bay.

“I can’t believe you’re alive,” whispered Keith, “what even happened to you?”

“It's complicated. Long story.”

“I have time.”

“Not right now.” Their hug broke and Matt took his place beside Keith, resting his hand on the small of his back. Keith swore he could see tears in Matt's eyes, but he paid no mind as they made their way down the hall.

“I could talk for hours,” Matt continued, “and you know that. But you, sir, look exhausted. Therefore, according to my tedious calculations, you should take a nap. A seventeen-hour nap. Feel free to sleep more, but no less.”

Keith chuckled and nudged Matt in the side. “I'm not that tired, I'll be fine.” Despite the drawn-out yawn after, his words seemed true and genuine. To him, that is.

“Get your tired ass in that room,” Matt scolded, yet finding it impossible to keep himself from smiling.

“Sir, yes sir.” Keith saluted to him and reached his door, pressing it open.

“I'll tell you everything tomorrow. I promise.”

“You’ll be sorry if you don’t.”

“I’m sure I will.”

 

***

 

Just like old times, Keith and Matt were inseparable. As soon as Keith came back from missions, they'd find each other and relax, and Matt would often tend to Keith's wounds while scolding him to be more careful. Still, they found comfort in one another, and it was easy to pick up where they left off in their friendship. Keith became relaxed and happier, which was surprising to the rest of the group. And, with Matt's support, he found it easier to deal with the rigor of the Blade of Marmora. Everything was settling into place for Keith, and it wasn't long before his heart yearned for something more between them.

It started off as a nagging feeling. Sure, Keith was deeply, _platonically_ , in love with Matt, but romantically? Maybe— no, no he wasn't, because that would ruin everything between them if he acted on his hypothetical feelings. Matt was a great friend; he cared for Keith and looked out for him, and there's nothing inherently romantic about providing comfort for a friend. Nothing Matt did suggested that he wanted anything more between them, and that was fine. Keith did the same, but he couldn't help that his touch lingered a few seconds longer, or that he yearned for Matt's presence more and more with each passing mission. That didn't mean he was in love with Matt.

But what if he was? There's nothing wrong with having a little crush on a friend, or letting it develop to where it became deeper, more serious. Nothing between them was forced, and it was just how Keith grew to feel. So, in silence, Keith loved Matt with his whole heart, never expecting it to progress any further.

Until it did.

It was the mission at Naxela, when Keith flung himself at the forcefield in an attempt to disarm it. If Lotor hadn’t stopped him with the blast from his sincline ship, he would have died. No one seemed to notice what he was doing except for Matt, who was screaming into his intercom to stop before it was too late. By the time he was able to get his ship out of the way, his hands were shaking and his heart jumped into his throat, closing his airways and making it impossible to breathe. Still, in his panicked state, Keith flew back to the castle and was safe. His mind couldn’t process anything that had happened, and he sat in his ship, unable to move.

Matt burst into the ship minutes later, demanding, “Why did you do that? Keith, you almost _died._ ”

Keith couldn’t move nor speak, instead resting his forehead into his shaking hands and clenching the roots of his sweaty hair. He was able to breathe better now that he wasn’t trying to flee from death, but his mind was still racing a million times a second. He heard Matt approach him, felt a steady hand on his back, before he was inched out of his seat and onto the floor. Matt was shaking too, and his breath seemed flighty and panicked, just like his own.

However, unlike Keith, Matt was still able to speak. “You’re safe now, buddy. It’ll all be okay.”

Keith rested his head in the crook of Matt’s neck, once again feeling tears spring in the corner of his eyes. Though, Matt already beat him to it, as he heard suppressed sniffling and choked sobs from the other.

“I almost lost you,” he heard him mumble, feeling his grasp tighten around his frame. “That was too close— don’t you _ever_ try that shit again, do you understand me?”

Keith nodded.

“You’re too important, you can’t throw yourself away like that. People need you, they love you and everything that you do.”

Keith nodded again, but his heart stopped as Matt continued.

“ _I_ love you, Keith.” Matt paused, allowing the words to sink deep into Keith’s conscience. “And— And I can’t let you ever do that again. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I let that happen to you.”

Before Keith could hold himself back, he pulled away from Matt’s embrace and cupped his cheeks with both hands. He wanted so badly to push Matt away, to reject everything that he said, because he knew how everything would end. But he yearned for this moment to happen, and he needed something like this in his life, even if it was temporary. Maybe he could risk it this time. Just this once.

“I love you, too.”

Seconds passed as they gazed into each other's tear-filled eyes. They leaned forward, kissing each other and finally relieving the unresolved tension between them. It was soft and tentative, considering both weren’t entirely sure what they were doing, but it was real. And that mattered more than anything.

Keith wiped Matt’s stray tears away once their kiss broke and settled back into his arms, bringing him closer than they were before.

"I never thought I'd ever be able to do that."

"Here I am, once again, proving you wrong." Matt kissed the side of his head and smiled into his hair. “You’ve gotta be exhausted,” he heard him continue, “should we head back to the rooms?”

“I want to stay here. Just a little bit longer.”

“Okay, we can do that."

Keith felt Matt’s fingers run through his hair, and he let out a quiet hum in response. He wanted to stay in Matt’s arms forever, because his embrace was the closest feeling of security he had ever experienced before. Maybe he’d melt into a puddle of warmth and happiness if he stayed there too long, but he knew they had to move. The team would be looking for them soon enough to discuss the success of the mission and how they were going to deal with Lotor. So, with great reluctance, Keith moved away from Matt and let his hands drop to his thighs.

“We should probably get going now.”

“Agreed.”

But neither of them moved a muscle, lost in each other’s gazes, before closing the gap between their lips again.

 

***

 

In the days following the Naxela mission, Keith and Matt began to figure out what was going on between them. They decided to take their time, feeling that rushing things would end up more catastrophic than beneficial. They enjoyed each other’s company over the weeks, finding comfort in their shared kisses and nights spent cuddling under a warm blanket. Often times, Keith would find Matt waiting for him with open arms after missions with the Blade. He was glad to see such a kind face as soon as he came back from his duties, especially when they were physically and emotionally taxing. He felt at peace during the war, and he wouldn’t have wanted things any other way.

However, in due time, Matt had to join the rebels again. The day finally came where he had to depart, and after a few shared kisses, they said their goodbyes.

“I’ll miss you,” Matt told him. “You be careful out there, okay? No sacrificing yourself.” He squeezed Keith’s shoulder and pulled him in for a tight hug.

“Yeah, I know. You’ve told me a million times.” Keith rubbed Matt’s back before pulling away to look at him one more time. “You have to be careful too, this isn’t a one-sided deal here.”

“I will, because I’m not reckless like you are.” He winked, a bright smile toying with his lips. “Hopefully we can see each other soon.”

“If you don’t die, that is.”

“No, no, _I’m_ the one who’s supposed to say that.”

Their chuckles were cut short by someone calling Matt’s name, and he pulled himself away from Keith’s arms.

With a dramatic wave, Matt yelled one final goodbye as he jogged to join the rebel fighter near the loading dock. Keith smiled and waved back without a care in the world, because he never knew those moments together would be their last.

Nothing could compare Keith for the shitstorm of events coming his way. Before he knew it, Keith found his mother, Krolia, on a Blade mission to recover information about a secret weapon. They ended up becoming stranded on a space whale for two years, where he eventually learned more about his identify and vital information about Lotor. After his traumatic fight with Shiro, he and the paladins battled against Lotor and his ship in the Quantum Abyss. Space was torn apart, and the explosion of the castle that was used to mend it caused a three-year time skip for the rest of the universe around them. Keith hoped with all his heart that Matt was okay, but he couldn’t find time to dwell on their most-likely-shattered relationship, seeing as he had to lead his team back to Earth. And they made it, saving their home from Galran invaders in the process. They were heroes once again, and they always will be, but Keith couldn’t help the sense of dread that followed.

What in the world even happened to Matt?

 

***

 

Keith stirred, awoken by incessant proddings to his cheek by a certain companion. He grumbled, burying his face in Kosmo’s warm fur, not wanting to open his eyes. But there was a feeling that someone else was there, waiting for him to get up, and it wasn't his mom. Blinking several times, Keith peered around the room until his eyes landed on a man sitting in the corner, staring right back at him.

Oh, god.

Without thinking, Keith sat up as fast as he could, ignoring the jolts of pain in his side. The other stood, rushing to make his way over to the bed.

“Keith— it's been forever."

“Matt,” Keith breathed, taking his hand. “It’s so good to see you again.”


End file.
